seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
