If that was your dad, he is hot
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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