You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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