ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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