Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
