All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
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