If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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