# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
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