physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
