Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
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