haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
