Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
