Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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