I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize