i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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