You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
