You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Randomize
