Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
