Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize