and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
