I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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