Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize