Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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