matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
