i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
two words: eviction party
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Randomize
