I must be too annoying 4 u.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
