After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
is this the sara with the beer cane?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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