In the future we'll all be gay
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
