I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize