I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Randomize