My nipple is on Facebook.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
