i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
