I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
