You smell like stripper and shame
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
