you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
