is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
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