Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
