she kept yelling 'call me bella'
she looked like the before picture.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
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