Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
