OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
