went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
