I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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