fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
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