I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
