Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
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