What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize