Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
