I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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