I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize