how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
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