U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize